A collection of little lives, each lived one day at a time…
Sometimes, on good days, for falling in love
And on other days, thinking of the love that could have been there.
Almost.
Kind of sad reminiscences of past days that one wants to get back and yet cannot do so ... memories that take back one to one's childhood and brings one back to the present, to deal with it, and tackle all its nuances that do not leave the space to Be Who You Really Are ... Nice Rendition ...
Another Monday…one of those many when I woke up wondering would it really matter if I sit back at home doing absolutely nothing. I bet no…I have at least a dozen friends who do exactly the same, and except for the occasional cribbing about life sans job being a boring one, life seems perfectly OK for them. They do hang out with friends, more often than I do, since they have free weekdays too, unlike me. They do go for vacation…dad-sponsored…unlike me…for whom vacation means taking the earliest flight back home and catching the latest flight back to work. They do take afternoon nap till date, something I have left with my summer holidays in college. They do ask their dads for money till date, something I haven’t done for years now. All the money talks with my dad have been limited to investment plans and tax return filings. And to be honest, I miss those days when I had to ask dad for an ice cream or had to save pennies to buy a book I had been eying for months. They still ...
Another weekend, an almost normal one. Except some crazy living-life moments… moments of caring and sharing…of togetherness! With usual dose of laziness! Have been lazing around the whole day, canceling plans (some serious ones, like appointment with optometrist), having good-old-hostel favorite Maggi for lunch, home delivered dinner (Told mom that I cooked in the morning…liar me!!), watching movies, reading up, and having soul-talks. In short, wanting to be alone. And more importantly, being alone! Which brings me to the obvious question – Am I a loner? With loads of friends around, laughter and endless crazy plans, why do I suddenly shut the world out? Much like ‘I shut my eyes and the world drops dead’! Why do I feel this urge to be alone at times? Absolutely alone! Why can’t I talk to people around (as my friends do to me, even at wee hours of the night) to sort things out that bother me? Is it because I am scared to trust people? Or I love myself too much to share my de...
A lazy Saturday…with an unexplainable feeling of “donno what’s wrong”…or perhaps I do! Making me wonder, is sudden ‘the number you are trying to call is switched off’ enough to let my mind wander and wonder the whole night? Enough to wake up late with a bad migraine! And wanting to fast forward to Monday…so that I can find myself busy working. They say an idle brain is a devil’s workshop, and the devil that I am, my idle brain almost attains the level of being a perfectionist devil when it gets a chance. With some old songs playing over and over again , a chord suddenly stuck my mind. Attachment phobia! Was discussing the same with someone a few days back, advising rather. Only to end up with the realization I do not practice what I preach. Strange as it may seem, I don’t even miss the city I grew up in as much as I should. Miss those people in the city. NO! At times it feels good to think that I miss, but I don’t. I keep finding reasons to miss, make myself believe that I do, b...
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